Thanks to the Minnesota Vikings and Kansas City Chiefs, the entire first round changes. So here is my FINAL mock.
1. Miami Dolphins-OT Jake Long Michigan-They got the guy they wanted and I told you so.
2. St. Louis Rams-DT Glenn Dorsey Louisiana State-Although I disagree with it, it is looking more and more like teams are getting over the fear of Dorseys injuries. Its not that hes not worthy of a pick this high, but just not for the rams who just drafted a DT in the top 15 LAST YEAR.
3. Atlanta Falcons-DE Chris Long Virginia-Falcons take whichever D-lineman that the Rams dont.
4. Oakland Raiders-RB Darren McFadden Arkansas-They get the guy that they want because the three teams in front of them dont need a RB.
5. Kansas City Chiefs-DE Vernon Gholston Ohio State-Although overrated, there is no denying that this guy can get to the QB, a trait that makes him a perfect it to replace the recently departed DE Allen.
6. New York Jets-DE Sedrick Ellis USC-Poor The Jets. The two guys that they wanted went off the board right in front of them. But Ellis is no consolation prize, but hes also certainly not the guy that they wanted.
7. New England Patriots-LB Keith Rivers USC-Upon further review, it makes more sense for the Patriots to take a buy from a big school like USC at a position of need than a guy from a small school like Troy for any kind of need.
8. Baltimore Ravens-QB Matt Ryan Boston College-Baltimore catches Ryans fall, and both are very happy. They may be rewarded with a playoff visit in the next few years.
9. Cincinnatti Bengals-OT Ryan Cladie Boisie State-Neither Dorsey nor Ellis is looking like they will fall to them, so Cincy has to take Cladie, who will help their O-line a lot, but is not the guy they wanted.
10. New Orleans Saints-CB Leodis McKelvin Troy-By virtue of the Patriots passing on a corner, the Saints get the best one in the draft.
11. Buffalo Bills-WR Devin Thomas Michigan State-The Bills have found a way to justify this pick enough that it is almost a lock. I dont like it, though. Especially with DRC still on the board.
12. Denver Broncos-OT Chris Williams Vanderbilt-Good O-line=good running game=playoff appearance in Denver.
13. Carolina Panthers-DE Derrick Harvey Florida-Mike Ruckers retirement kind of shifted the Panthers thinking. I really like this pick for them.
14. Chicago Bears-OT Jeff Otah Pittsburgh-If Otah is on the board, they will take him, assuming that an improved O-line will help both the running and passing game. If Otah is off the board, look for this pick to be Rashard Mendenhall.
15. Detroit Lions-HB Rashard Mendenhall Illinois-The Lions try to fix their running problem with Harvey off the board.
16. Arizona Cardinals-CB Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie Tennessee State-The Cards are ecstatic to get the 2nd best corner in the draft (a need position).
17. Kansas City Chiefs-DE Phillip Merling Clemson-Yep. The Chiefs still miss out on a good lineman. I honestly believe that the Chiefs pulled this move to go young and quick on the defensive side of the ball. This would be a good way to do it.
18. Houston Texans-RB Jonathan Stewart Oregon-Ahman Green is not the answer.
19. Philadelphia Eagles-S Kenny Phillips Miami (FL)-Look for Lito Sheppard to get traded on draft day.
20. Tampa Bay Buccanneers-WR DeSean Jackson California-No longer rated as the top WR, but the Bucs still get him.
21. Washington Redskins-DE Calais Campbell Miami-It is looking more and more like Washington is leaning D-line with this pick, and Campbell is the best value at this spot.
22. Dallas Cowboys-RB Felix Jones Ark-Jones could go 22 or 28, but this is a touch safer.
23. Pittsburgh Steelers-OT Gosder Cherilus Boston College-Cherilus is a lifelong Steeler waiting to happen.
24. Tennessee Titans-WR James Hardy Indiana-Sweeds injury concerns are dropping him out of first round contention. Hardy is safer.
25. Seattle Seahawks-DT Kentwan Balmer North Carolina-The Hawks also are looking to go more D-line with this pick, and Balmer is the best value here.
26. Jacksonville Jaguars-DE Quentin Groves Auburn-Its all about the D-line in Jacksonville.
27. San Diego Chargers-OT Sam Baker Southern California-Once again, no Brandon Albert. But hes got to be gone earlier than this, right? Anyway, Baker is a safe choice and home town fan fave.
28. Dallas Cowboys-CB Antoine Cason Arizona-Cowboys take best CB available at this point.
29. San Francisco 49ers-LB Jerod Mayo Tennessee-No other reciever is worthy of a pick here, so the 9ers take a guy who might be the best linebacker in the draft. Pair him with Patrick Willis and you are going to have a dominant linebacking core for a long time.
30. Green Bay Packers-CB Brandon Flowers Va Tech-This is a lock.
31. New York Giants-CB Aqib Talib Kansas-CB is more of a need position for the Giants than linebacker, so Talibs fall is more worthy of snatching up at the bottom of the round than is Dan Connor.
Friday, April 25
Thursday, April 24
I fixed it
It took a lot of work, but I got my work conflict resolved. So dont worry. Everythings going to be alright. Calm down. Exhale.
Wednesday, April 23
Im screwed
I cannot get time off of work for a thing that I need to go to. Should I get fired, or piss off the person that I made the other commitment with? Vote here. Oops. How about here? Screw it.
Tuesday, April 22
Monday, April 21
Utah Jazz
My favorite professional basketball team went up 1-0 in their first round playoff serious with the Houston Rockets. Now all they have to do is win their next three home games, and its on to round two. Concidering that they have only lost four times at home this season, then they will be fine
Sunday, April 20
Draft Time
Sorry for the delay. I have been doing a lot of research for this, so lets get started. This mock will NOT project trades. They are too hard to predict. Thus, this would be what I would consider an "unrealistic" draft. But, hey, its the best that we can do.
1. Miami Dolphins-Jake Long OT Michigan-In my last "mock," I had Chris Long going in this spot. Well, a lot has happened since then, most importantly of which is the Fins openly trying to get a deal done with Jake Long. The Dolphins obviously have so many needs to fill that they would love to trade down, but with no clear cut number one pick, nobody wants to trade up. So the Dolphins are basically forced to give up on that option. Then the other factor guiding this decision comes into play: the economic factor. Last year, JaMarcus Russell made the most money ever by a number one pick. Whoever ends up being the number one pick is going to expect similar money, but that is largely based on position. So that rules out Matt Ryan. He would earn too much money. That also rules out Chris Long. Tackle would be a position that normally makes less money than QBs, RBs and such. So Jake Long is the pick. But, talks are currently stalling, so if the Fins cant get a deal worked out before draft day, look for this pick to be Vernon Gholston, a guy who nobody really expects to be a number one, who would probably take a smaller amount of money, and who I think is freakishly overrated and might not even belong in the first round, similar to a Derrick Johnson kind of guy, who was put in the top five of every mock draft until draft day, when suddenly he wasnt even worthy of a first round pick. He fell all the way to 15 where the Kansas City Chiefs snapped him up and he has actually turned into a decent player. Anyway, though, Jake Long should be the pick here. I think that they should trade down, though. Maybe to a Kansas City, or something.
2. St. Louis Rams- Chris Long DE Virginia- The Rams might be in the best position in the draft. The two guys who are likely to be picked first over all (Chris/Jake Long) both are fantastic players who satisfy needs. They just take whichever one falls to them. Chris might actually be the better pick for them because, despite what their record was last year, the Rams are a pretty good team, especially in the weak NFC West. They just had a ton of injuries last year. Their offense can be dominant when healthy, and if you consider that their defensive line could consist of Long, Leonard Little, and Adam Carriker. One little playoff run and they could be Super Bowl contenders.
3. Atlanta Falcons- Glenn Dorsey DT LSU- The Falcons are also one of the few teams at the top of this draft who have numerous holes to fill. But with their abundance of draft picks in the next few rounds, it seems almost more likely that they would move up rather than down. With that said, they will probably keep this pick and take the best player available. If Dorsey had not had some injuries in college, he would likely be the consensus number one selection in this draft. So that might make him, one could say, the "steal" of the draft.
4. Oakland Raiders-Darren McFadden RB Arkansas-Al Davis would be the idiot who would do something like this. With a running back who broke out last season and other obvious needs elsewhere, he would be the guy who would waste a high pick like this on a young hot shot. They just traded away a jerk named Randy Moss-why draft this jerk? They should trade down with somebody like New England so they can justify taking a guy like Brandon Albert.
5. Kansas City Chiefs-Ryan Clady OT Boisie State-This will be this years Levi Brown. They are going to reach on Clady when they should fix a major need by taking Matt Ryan. Clady will fill a whole, though...
6. New York Jets-Vernon Gholston OLB Ohio St.-The Jets are hoping that McFadden falls, but since Al Davis is an idiot, the Jets get the most overrated player in the first round. Filling the DT need with Sedrick Ellis would be smarter, but it is too much of a reach for that to ever come true.
7. New England Patriots-Leodis McKelvin CB Troy- The departure of Asante Samuel and Randall Gay pretty much locked this pick up as a CB. The question is this: who do the Pats think is better, McKelvin or Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie?
8. Baltimore Ravens-Matt Ryan QB Boston College-The retirement of Steve McNair pretty much locked this pick up as a QB. If Ryan is off the board, they might even reach on a guy like Brian Brohm.
9. Cincinnati Bengals-Sedrick Ellis DT USC-Ellis might be more NFL ready than Glenn Dorsey, who, as stated before, might be the best player in the draft. So taking a guy like Ellis at nine is a huge steal.
10. New Orelans Saints-Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie CB Tennessee St.-The Saints take whoever the Pats dont.
11. Buffalo Bills-Mike Jenkins CB South Florida-Malcom Kellys terrible Pro Day combined with the fact that no other reciever is worthy of a pick this high assured that this would be a CB.
12. Denver Broncos-Chris Williams OT Vanderbilt-When Shanahan whips this guy into shape and makes sure that he loves football, he will fit in perfectly into Denvers dominant zone blocking scheme.
13. Carolina Panthers-Jeff Otah OT Pittsburgh-Carolina is very inconsistant. Some weeks they look like Super Bowl contenders. Other weeks they look like the worst team in football. But they still have big pieces like a great defense, a QB who can play at a Pro Bowl level, a running back who could break out big time this year, and the best reciever in football. Thats enough pieces so that they cant pick a QB or RB and give up on this season. They have to take a tackle and hope that all of the pieces stay healthy this time and they can make a deep playoff run.
14. Chicago Bears-Rashard Mendenhall RB Illinois-Cedric Benson proved last year that he is not the answer at running back. ANY offensive help is what the bears wants. Mendenhall is explosive, and maybe in a few years can help the Bears claw their way back into the playoffs.
15. Detroit Lions-Derrick Harvey DE Florida-Surprised a reciever isnt the pick here? Me too. But heres hoping that the Lions are smart this year and start helping their defensive unit. Seriously, with the departure of Shaun Rodgers, can you name anybody on their defensive line? Neither can I. Harvey, who could go as high as 7 to New England, would help that in a big way.
16. Arizona Cardinals-Keith Rivers LB USC-A guy who could go as early as 7 to New England could really help a team that in rapidly improving and could easily win the weak NFC West.
17. Minnesota Vikings-Phillip Merling DE Clemson-I had a rare opportunity the other day. I live in Minnesota, and I ran into Vikings Pro Bowl DT Pat Williams. We talked draft for a while, and he said that he hopes they pick up Merling. I asked him if he was concerned about his injury, and he reminded me that everyone was concerned about Adrian Petersons injury last season, and he seems to be doing just fine. If they do manage to get Jared Allen away from the Chiefs, I dont know what their pick will be here, but Im still not sold on their recieving core. A guy like DeSean Jackson would be a big help and could also help their returning duties.
18. Houston Texans-Jonathan Stewart RB Oregon-The running back situation in Houston is far from resolved, and Stewart might be able to help that.
19. Philadelphia Eagles-Kenny Phillips S Miami-A reciever seems like a logical pick here, but historically, the Eagles dont take recievers in the first round. Plus, that would show that they are committed to Donovan McNabb, which Im not sure that they are. Phillips will be a nice replacement for Brian Dawkins someday.
20. Tampa Bay Buccanneers-DeSean Jackson WR Cal-The offense in Tampa is pitiful, so Jackson helps there, not to mention he helps in the return game, which is something that Tampa has always sucked at.
21. Washington Redskins-Limas Sweed WR Texas-The guy might be the best reciever in the draft, but once again, injury concerns hold him back.
22. Dallas Cowboys-Felix Jones RB Arkansas-This human ball of speed will be what Julius Jones never could be for Marion Barber III.
23. Pittsburgh Steelers-Gosder Cherilus OT Boston College-This is the last O-line guy I have going in the first round and you might notice that Brandon Albert isnt on the list. That is because I am almost certain that he will not fall this far, but I have no idea who would take him up any higher. So I left him off completely.
24. Tennessee Titans-Devin Thomas WR Michigan St.-This one year wonder combined with Alge Crumpler might give Vince Young enough weapons to make a playoff run.
25. Seattle Seahawks-Dustin Keller TE Purdue-The Seahawks, playing in the weak NFC West, are constantly in position to win the division, and thus are forced to try and compete and cannot really make a risky pick. Keller will be a good target for Hasselbeck, though.
26. Jacksonville Jaguars-Kentwan Balmer DT North Carolina-DT fills a need. 'Nuff said.
27. San Diego Chargers-Brandon Flowers CB Virginia Tech-CB fills a need.
28. Dallas Cowboys-Aqib Talib CB Kansas-After taking an offensive pick early, they help out their defense with Talib, who earlier was being picked in the top ten, but is now cold.
29. San Fransisco 49ers-James Hardy WR Indiana-the 9ers are really high on Hardy, for some reason, although Im not sure what that reason is.
30. Green Bay Packers-Antoine Cason CB Arizona-My only knock on this guy is that Im not sure this guys hair is long enough to play CB in Green Bay.
31. New York Giants-Dan Connor LB Penn St.-This guy might be the most underrated player in the first round and should, in my mind, at least, go somewhere between 10 and 15. So naturally the defending champs are ecstatic to have a guy who fills a need and is this fantastic fall this far.
1. Miami Dolphins-Jake Long OT Michigan-In my last "mock," I had Chris Long going in this spot. Well, a lot has happened since then, most importantly of which is the Fins openly trying to get a deal done with Jake Long. The Dolphins obviously have so many needs to fill that they would love to trade down, but with no clear cut number one pick, nobody wants to trade up. So the Dolphins are basically forced to give up on that option. Then the other factor guiding this decision comes into play: the economic factor. Last year, JaMarcus Russell made the most money ever by a number one pick. Whoever ends up being the number one pick is going to expect similar money, but that is largely based on position. So that rules out Matt Ryan. He would earn too much money. That also rules out Chris Long. Tackle would be a position that normally makes less money than QBs, RBs and such. So Jake Long is the pick. But, talks are currently stalling, so if the Fins cant get a deal worked out before draft day, look for this pick to be Vernon Gholston, a guy who nobody really expects to be a number one, who would probably take a smaller amount of money, and who I think is freakishly overrated and might not even belong in the first round, similar to a Derrick Johnson kind of guy, who was put in the top five of every mock draft until draft day, when suddenly he wasnt even worthy of a first round pick. He fell all the way to 15 where the Kansas City Chiefs snapped him up and he has actually turned into a decent player. Anyway, though, Jake Long should be the pick here. I think that they should trade down, though. Maybe to a Kansas City, or something.
2. St. Louis Rams- Chris Long DE Virginia- The Rams might be in the best position in the draft. The two guys who are likely to be picked first over all (Chris/Jake Long) both are fantastic players who satisfy needs. They just take whichever one falls to them. Chris might actually be the better pick for them because, despite what their record was last year, the Rams are a pretty good team, especially in the weak NFC West. They just had a ton of injuries last year. Their offense can be dominant when healthy, and if you consider that their defensive line could consist of Long, Leonard Little, and Adam Carriker. One little playoff run and they could be Super Bowl contenders.
3. Atlanta Falcons- Glenn Dorsey DT LSU- The Falcons are also one of the few teams at the top of this draft who have numerous holes to fill. But with their abundance of draft picks in the next few rounds, it seems almost more likely that they would move up rather than down. With that said, they will probably keep this pick and take the best player available. If Dorsey had not had some injuries in college, he would likely be the consensus number one selection in this draft. So that might make him, one could say, the "steal" of the draft.
4. Oakland Raiders-Darren McFadden RB Arkansas-Al Davis would be the idiot who would do something like this. With a running back who broke out last season and other obvious needs elsewhere, he would be the guy who would waste a high pick like this on a young hot shot. They just traded away a jerk named Randy Moss-why draft this jerk? They should trade down with somebody like New England so they can justify taking a guy like Brandon Albert.
5. Kansas City Chiefs-Ryan Clady OT Boisie State-This will be this years Levi Brown. They are going to reach on Clady when they should fix a major need by taking Matt Ryan. Clady will fill a whole, though...
6. New York Jets-Vernon Gholston OLB Ohio St.-The Jets are hoping that McFadden falls, but since Al Davis is an idiot, the Jets get the most overrated player in the first round. Filling the DT need with Sedrick Ellis would be smarter, but it is too much of a reach for that to ever come true.
7. New England Patriots-Leodis McKelvin CB Troy- The departure of Asante Samuel and Randall Gay pretty much locked this pick up as a CB. The question is this: who do the Pats think is better, McKelvin or Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie?
8. Baltimore Ravens-Matt Ryan QB Boston College-The retirement of Steve McNair pretty much locked this pick up as a QB. If Ryan is off the board, they might even reach on a guy like Brian Brohm.
9. Cincinnati Bengals-Sedrick Ellis DT USC-Ellis might be more NFL ready than Glenn Dorsey, who, as stated before, might be the best player in the draft. So taking a guy like Ellis at nine is a huge steal.
10. New Orelans Saints-Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie CB Tennessee St.-The Saints take whoever the Pats dont.
11. Buffalo Bills-Mike Jenkins CB South Florida-Malcom Kellys terrible Pro Day combined with the fact that no other reciever is worthy of a pick this high assured that this would be a CB.
12. Denver Broncos-Chris Williams OT Vanderbilt-When Shanahan whips this guy into shape and makes sure that he loves football, he will fit in perfectly into Denvers dominant zone blocking scheme.
13. Carolina Panthers-Jeff Otah OT Pittsburgh-Carolina is very inconsistant. Some weeks they look like Super Bowl contenders. Other weeks they look like the worst team in football. But they still have big pieces like a great defense, a QB who can play at a Pro Bowl level, a running back who could break out big time this year, and the best reciever in football. Thats enough pieces so that they cant pick a QB or RB and give up on this season. They have to take a tackle and hope that all of the pieces stay healthy this time and they can make a deep playoff run.
14. Chicago Bears-Rashard Mendenhall RB Illinois-Cedric Benson proved last year that he is not the answer at running back. ANY offensive help is what the bears wants. Mendenhall is explosive, and maybe in a few years can help the Bears claw their way back into the playoffs.
15. Detroit Lions-Derrick Harvey DE Florida-Surprised a reciever isnt the pick here? Me too. But heres hoping that the Lions are smart this year and start helping their defensive unit. Seriously, with the departure of Shaun Rodgers, can you name anybody on their defensive line? Neither can I. Harvey, who could go as high as 7 to New England, would help that in a big way.
16. Arizona Cardinals-Keith Rivers LB USC-A guy who could go as early as 7 to New England could really help a team that in rapidly improving and could easily win the weak NFC West.
17. Minnesota Vikings-Phillip Merling DE Clemson-I had a rare opportunity the other day. I live in Minnesota, and I ran into Vikings Pro Bowl DT Pat Williams. We talked draft for a while, and he said that he hopes they pick up Merling. I asked him if he was concerned about his injury, and he reminded me that everyone was concerned about Adrian Petersons injury last season, and he seems to be doing just fine. If they do manage to get Jared Allen away from the Chiefs, I dont know what their pick will be here, but Im still not sold on their recieving core. A guy like DeSean Jackson would be a big help and could also help their returning duties.
18. Houston Texans-Jonathan Stewart RB Oregon-The running back situation in Houston is far from resolved, and Stewart might be able to help that.
19. Philadelphia Eagles-Kenny Phillips S Miami-A reciever seems like a logical pick here, but historically, the Eagles dont take recievers in the first round. Plus, that would show that they are committed to Donovan McNabb, which Im not sure that they are. Phillips will be a nice replacement for Brian Dawkins someday.
20. Tampa Bay Buccanneers-DeSean Jackson WR Cal-The offense in Tampa is pitiful, so Jackson helps there, not to mention he helps in the return game, which is something that Tampa has always sucked at.
21. Washington Redskins-Limas Sweed WR Texas-The guy might be the best reciever in the draft, but once again, injury concerns hold him back.
22. Dallas Cowboys-Felix Jones RB Arkansas-This human ball of speed will be what Julius Jones never could be for Marion Barber III.
23. Pittsburgh Steelers-Gosder Cherilus OT Boston College-This is the last O-line guy I have going in the first round and you might notice that Brandon Albert isnt on the list. That is because I am almost certain that he will not fall this far, but I have no idea who would take him up any higher. So I left him off completely.
24. Tennessee Titans-Devin Thomas WR Michigan St.-This one year wonder combined with Alge Crumpler might give Vince Young enough weapons to make a playoff run.
25. Seattle Seahawks-Dustin Keller TE Purdue-The Seahawks, playing in the weak NFC West, are constantly in position to win the division, and thus are forced to try and compete and cannot really make a risky pick. Keller will be a good target for Hasselbeck, though.
26. Jacksonville Jaguars-Kentwan Balmer DT North Carolina-DT fills a need. 'Nuff said.
27. San Diego Chargers-Brandon Flowers CB Virginia Tech-CB fills a need.
28. Dallas Cowboys-Aqib Talib CB Kansas-After taking an offensive pick early, they help out their defense with Talib, who earlier was being picked in the top ten, but is now cold.
29. San Fransisco 49ers-James Hardy WR Indiana-the 9ers are really high on Hardy, for some reason, although Im not sure what that reason is.
30. Green Bay Packers-Antoine Cason CB Arizona-My only knock on this guy is that Im not sure this guys hair is long enough to play CB in Green Bay.
31. New York Giants-Dan Connor LB Penn St.-This guy might be the most underrated player in the first round and should, in my mind, at least, go somewhere between 10 and 15. So naturally the defending champs are ecstatic to have a guy who fills a need and is this fantastic fall this far.
Wednesday, April 16
Im so Sick of Speaking Words that No One Understands...
Seriously. Its not even just you guys. You random people on the web are part of the problem, but no one on the planet gets how much of a genious I am. Im just sitting here waiting to be discovered. Seriously, historians will look back on my life and develop theories about me. They will contemplate me, question me, quarrell about me-but they shall never fully grasp me. You shall see
Monday, April 7
The Greatest Guitar Riffs
Ok, so this isnt like an official list or anything, but I am mad right now because my local newwspaper put out a list of what people voted on to be the greatest guitar riffs of all time. #1 was Smoke on the Water. What a joke! Its an ok riff, but not that cool, and definetly overplayed. They also included Give it Away by the Red Hot Chilli Peppers. Dont get me wrong, I love the Chillis, but that guitar riff does not belong on the list. So here is my unofficial list of the greatest 25 guitar riffs of all time:
1. Hanging By a Moment-Lifehouse
2. Carry On Wayward Son-Kansas'
3. Black Hole Sun-Soundgarden
4. Money for Nothing-Dire Straits
5. Smells Like Teen Spirit-Nirvana
6. Enter Sandman-Metallica
7. Don't Fear the Reaper-Blue Oyester Cult
8. Under the Bridge-The Red Hot Chilli Peppers
9. Sad But True-Metallica
10. Come As You Are-Nirvana
11. Otherside-The Red Hot Chilli Peppers
12. Seven Nation Army-The White Stipes
13. Give it Away?-Screw this this is hard. Try this list on for size:
The Greatest Guitar Riff Creators of All Time:
1. James Hetfield-Metallica
2. Chris Cornell-Soundgarden
3. Mark Knopfler-Dire Straits
4. Kurt Cobain-Nirvana
5. Screw this, this is hard too! Lets try greatest solos ever
1. Stairway to Heaven-Led Zeppelin
2. Eruption-Eddie Van Halen
3. Hotel California-The Eagles
4. Crazy Train-Ozzy Ozbourne
5. Johnny B. Goode-Chuck Berry
6. Bohemian Rhapsody-Queen
7. Fade to Black-Metallica
8. Smells Like Teen Spirit-Nirvana
9. Hot For Teacher-Eddie Van Halen
10. Master of Puppets-Metallica
11. Black Hole Sun-Soundgarden
12. In Bloom-Nirvana
13. Beat It-Michael Jackson
14. You Shook Me All Night Long-AC/DC
15. Killer Queen-Queen
16. Carry On Wayward Son-Kansas
17. Smoke on the Water-Deep Purple
18. Orion-Metallica
19. Back in Black-AC/DC
20. Stone Cold Crazy-Metallica
1. Hanging By a Moment-Lifehouse
2. Carry On Wayward Son-Kansas'
3. Black Hole Sun-Soundgarden
4. Money for Nothing-Dire Straits
5. Smells Like Teen Spirit-Nirvana
6. Enter Sandman-Metallica
7. Don't Fear the Reaper-Blue Oyester Cult
8. Under the Bridge-The Red Hot Chilli Peppers
9. Sad But True-Metallica
10. Come As You Are-Nirvana
11. Otherside-The Red Hot Chilli Peppers
12. Seven Nation Army-The White Stipes
13. Give it Away?-Screw this this is hard. Try this list on for size:
The Greatest Guitar Riff Creators of All Time:
1. James Hetfield-Metallica
2. Chris Cornell-Soundgarden
3. Mark Knopfler-Dire Straits
4. Kurt Cobain-Nirvana
5. Screw this, this is hard too! Lets try greatest solos ever
1. Stairway to Heaven-Led Zeppelin
2. Eruption-Eddie Van Halen
3. Hotel California-The Eagles
4. Crazy Train-Ozzy Ozbourne
5. Johnny B. Goode-Chuck Berry
6. Bohemian Rhapsody-Queen
7. Fade to Black-Metallica
8. Smells Like Teen Spirit-Nirvana
9. Hot For Teacher-Eddie Van Halen
10. Master of Puppets-Metallica
11. Black Hole Sun-Soundgarden
12. In Bloom-Nirvana
13. Beat It-Michael Jackson
14. You Shook Me All Night Long-AC/DC
15. Killer Queen-Queen
16. Carry On Wayward Son-Kansas
17. Smoke on the Water-Deep Purple
18. Orion-Metallica
19. Back in Black-AC/DC
20. Stone Cold Crazy-Metallica
Sunday, April 6
The 7.6
So, there is this female who The Egotistical One is obsessed with, but she is obsessed with me (for obvious reasons). She comes to see me at work everyday, but I feel absolutely nothing for her. So a while ago, The Egotistical One, The Bunny, and I (sorry for introducing so many characters into this story, but for now, just accept that The Bunny is my younger brother) decided to give her a call. The Bunny impersonated me and opened with the line: "Hey sexy, want to go to a dance?" It was awesome. She later hang up on us. Later, it was The 7.6s birthday (you will learn why this is her name shortly). So The Egotistical One and I wrote her a letter and included an old ID of mine, so that she might stare at my gloriousness and be in awe of my presence continually even when I am not physically in her presence. In the letter, The Egotistical One and I rated her physical attractiveness. The Egotistical One (who is obsessed with the 7.6, mind you) gave her a rating of 9.8. I gave her a rating of 7.6, and said that I only dated females rated an 8 or above. So, fastforward to yesterday, when I was at work. I cannot remember if I have revealed this yet, but my place of employment is a grocery store. So, the local drama club was bagging groceries for the customers and collecting their tips so that they might be able to improve their stage and props. The 7.6, who is not a member of the local drama club, showed up and bagged groceries at my register. It was pathetic. I believe that we owe her another call...
Tuesday, April 1
Ethical Implications?
This has got to be some sort of April Fool's Day joke! Gmail claims that it is now allowing their email users to set a custom time when the sent the email. Suppose you were supposed to email a friend about an upcoming event, but you forgot. Gmail says that it will take care of it for you so it looks like you sent it on time (or even early) so that your friend cannot be mad at you. What is more, is that Gmail can even make the email look like it has already been read! Imagine this scenario:
The Correct One: "Im sorry you couldnt make the party last night, it was a good time..."
The Egotistical One: "What party?"
The Correct One: "You know, that party at The Epitome of Cool's house."
The Egotistical One: "No, I dont know."
The Correct One: "Come on, I sent you that email. You never replied, so I just assumed that you couldnt go..."
The Egotistical One: "I never got an email."
The Correct One: "Yes you did, and Ill prove it to you."
(Our two heroes travel to The Egotistical One's house and log into his email account)
The Correct One: "See? Its right here, and you even read it already!"
The Egotistical Ones: "Oh! I must have forgotten about that. Dang! I wouldve gone too, but..."
The Correct One: "Well, not everyones brain is as good as mine, and by the way-how dare you question my ability to be right or not!"
The Egotistical One: "Sorry about that, I shouldve known better..."
The Correct One: "Thats right you shouldve known better. Now go get me a sandwich."
The Egotistical One: "Yes, sir."
But I digress...The point is that this brings up some serious ethical issues. Say you did this to your boss, or your boss did it to you. (Did you get the memo? No. Yes you did, and you already read it too!) Everyone can lie now, and from what I can tell, there is no way to detect it. When you got messages or not is now totally impossible to tell. Each Gmail user only gets 10 usages per year, but still, there is no way that this is ethically acceptable. I am disgusted. Now go get me a sandwich.
The Correct One: "Im sorry you couldnt make the party last night, it was a good time..."
The Egotistical One: "What party?"
The Correct One: "You know, that party at The Epitome of Cool's house."
The Egotistical One: "No, I dont know."
The Correct One: "Come on, I sent you that email. You never replied, so I just assumed that you couldnt go..."
The Egotistical One: "I never got an email."
The Correct One: "Yes you did, and Ill prove it to you."
(Our two heroes travel to The Egotistical One's house and log into his email account)
The Correct One: "See? Its right here, and you even read it already!"
The Egotistical Ones: "Oh! I must have forgotten about that. Dang! I wouldve gone too, but..."
The Correct One: "Well, not everyones brain is as good as mine, and by the way-how dare you question my ability to be right or not!"
The Egotistical One: "Sorry about that, I shouldve known better..."
The Correct One: "Thats right you shouldve known better. Now go get me a sandwich."
The Egotistical One: "Yes, sir."
But I digress...The point is that this brings up some serious ethical issues. Say you did this to your boss, or your boss did it to you. (Did you get the memo? No. Yes you did, and you already read it too!) Everyone can lie now, and from what I can tell, there is no way to detect it. When you got messages or not is now totally impossible to tell. Each Gmail user only gets 10 usages per year, but still, there is no way that this is ethically acceptable. I am disgusted. Now go get me a sandwich.
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